13 Nov 2012

Foodalicious

I have eaten so much today that I can hardly move. Even this deadly important message is written in my bed, in a weird position to keep all the food steadily in my stomach. Jesus, I didn't have to overreact, and try to compensate what I didn't eat on Culture Carnival. So yes, my appetite is back and so is my round belly...

Other people eating:
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And then there is me..
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11 Nov 2012

An update from the jungle

I'm not dead. But I have lost my appetite and that tells a lot. Few hours ago I called  an ambulance, and hopefully she is breathing. People are strange, they ignore me and after not talking to me even once, they put 3 cupcakes in my face. While sitting alone and observing Redrama perfome a girl says that she has never seen me as happy. When I try to laugh at her rubbish sarcasm, she explains how my eyes even sparkle of joy and I realize that she is dead serious. The worst "customer" of Culture Carnival goes to you who on four occasions bought retro t-shirts and apparently thought that the whole family back home need at least one shirt for every day of the year. And I'm terribly sorry that you didn't get that XL t-shirt for you father, XXL would have been waaay to big.  And if anyone wonders: the t- shirts were 2€ each.  If you're a 13 year-old-boy I can give you a precious advice; don't try to hit on me and especially don't tell me in advance of your intensions. In five hours I will be in the kitchen and helping them to create a mess.... Now the hard floor wants to sleep with me. 
 
Laters!

7 Nov 2012

OBAMA!


 
 
Last night I slept for staggering 33 minutes. It was my responsibility to assure that Mitt FUCKING Romney wouldn't win the elections. And when Obama tweeted of his re-election I fell down to the floor and began doing weird movements rated R. Someone might wonder why a person living in Finland would care so much about US politics. Firstly because of the great impact that United States, has on the world and secondly, because no reasonable human being would want a guy, who doesn't give a fuck about people’s health especially if they happen to poor, and finally has shown the world how to not think about human rights. If you didn’t like Romney’s plan for the future one day, you could always come back another day and find the plan changed to be more acceptable. Nobody needs a president who only has strong opinions but no hard fact to surround the valuations, “because God” isn’t an argument worth the time.

And no I’m not trying to make Obama look like an angel and I sure can see that mistakes has happened in the past, but we all have to remember in what a tricky situation Obama was left in after Bush and his awesome team had fucked up the economy. Also to top that crap, so came the enormous depression making unemployment common throughout the globe.    

And even if I today can sleep peacefully I wouldn't mind building that airplane for Romney that he so desperately wants. I believe he would enjoy the flight while rolling down the windows and fading into space and never returning back...
 
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31 Oct 2012

COCK


I was just added to a group on Fb called "groupsex"... Well apparently it's the page for the staff at Culture Carnival. So with my earlier doubts about these staff people, I just got my confirmation of the obvious suffocation that will occur next week. The worst part is their comments on the page; ”The weekend is on its way! What is your plans for the lovely weekend???" Yes. I would love to share my life with you, and hopefully you will find your way  to my blog and see how much I aDORE you.....

29 Oct 2012

Facepalm


I called my friend’s drawings terrible without having the knowledge that she had in fact drawn them. I saw the picture from up-side-down and thought it was some abstract shit. Jesus I felt awful and of course I just laughed a lot. The funny thing was the fact that the drawing was actually pretty cool. Fuck I hate my big MOUTH (not literally, because in real life situations I have difficulties in fitting a Big mac in my mouth)...



25 Oct 2012

The A-student

My last lesson in school was supreme. I watched a movie with the help of my Ipad and I completely forgot being among high IQ-students and I probably laught at very appropriate moments. So the highlight was when I found myself alone in the classroom, the lesson was already over. On my way out of the classroom the teacher came back and said that I he hadn't noticed me when he was checking out who had attended his class, well he was right; in my mind I was absent and far-off in the horisont....

23 Oct 2012

One plus one equal two


Not one, as you might wish. Alert of me being serious and maybe, a bit angry. I suppose I have thought about this quite a while, I have just not been able to express myself. Today when I visited my dearest website Facebook I noticed that one of my “friends” had posted this particular quote by Marilyn Monroe; "Being single doesn't mean you're weak, it means you're strong enough to wait for what you deserve"  and the post had over 50 likes, mainly by girls of course. This got me pissed off. I mean why would being single mean that you are weak in first place? I was hoping that we didn´t need some dead person to remind girls of something obvious. Monroe had the right to say what she said, but everyone should realize that she lived in a completely different kind of world where girls were expected to get married young and stay home with the children.

It is true that the media and some idiots are trying hard to point out that there is something wrong with us if we are incapable of finding the true love. I blame the Romantic fucking movies of letting girls have an idea of love where everything has a happy ending...  Guess what? There is no such thing as eternal love, maybe towards food but not within a relationship. Just take a look at your parents; are they all blinded by one another?  Didn´t think so either.

When girls see a pretty girl with her Oh- so-perfect-boyfriend, they usually think that if they were as pretty or as hilarious as the girl they could have a life similar. Bullshit, it’s even a miracle that two people meet and happen to like each other and on top of that are able to express how they feel

 I am aware of me being, as always, negative and cold and whatever. But what I am trying to say is that we shouldn´t be waiting for a better future to just jump into our arms.  Instead of imagining some unrealistic fairy tale in your heads you should be honest to the person who most deserves it, YOU! Don´t look in the mirror feeling sorry about you and wasting time on someone who obviously doesn´t give fuck of your existence. Yes, I´m harsh but the most of the time people don´t spend time thinking about you. The thing is that we have to believe in the importance of ourselves and understand that life isn’t about finding, but about creating ourselves.

The next time that friend of my grandma or the weird guy in the supermarket asks me why I don’t have a boyfriend I won´t be all “Well I don´t know” and act all awkward I will ask the person why he didn´t eat donkey for breakfast.

Great things happen when we least expect them, but also bad things follow the same pattern.